Pregnancy in a Nutshell

When I got pregnant, I had this feeling that pregnancy would really agree with me.  That I would be one of those glowing women whose ailments magically disappear and who look completely not pregnant except for the perfectly round basketball stomach.  Boy was I wrong!  Seeing as I'm so close to the end, I thought this would be a good time to write about some of the things I've learned and that I'll remember most about my pregnancy - good, bad, and ugly.  

• I have no clue why they call it morning sickness.  It would have been a dream come true if it were only in the mornings!  24/7 nausea for about 10 weeks sucks.  You feel like it will never end.  Thank heavens for Zofran and Kraft Spiral Mac & Cheese - the only things I could stomach for weeks.
• When I first started to feel her move, I spent countless nights with my hands pressed on my stomach, barely breathing, just hoping to feel a little flutter.  It was so sweet.  Now I sometimes swear that she is trying to shove her way out with total disregard for the ribs that might be in her way.  There is something so incredible about feeling a baby move, and it is definitely something I will miss.  
• I can't wait to regain feeling in my hands!!!! My fingers ache and tingle to the point that I can't feel things.  I drop everything and can't open stuff because I can't feel what I'm doing.  I will be so happy when this goes away!
• 30% of pregnant women with asthma see their symptoms lessen while pregnant.  I am not one of those 30%.
• This next one is a pro and a con.  People are really nice.  They open doors, offer to help and let you cut in line.  This is great.  Sometimes people are a little too nice.  They think that you may die from standing and always insist that you sit down.  This is mildly annoying.
• It's amazing the number of strangers who care about when you are due and if it's a boy or a girl and if you have a name picked out.  I'm not sure if they just don't know what else to say or what, but they will likely never see me again.  Even if they do, I hope they don't recognize me because if they do it means I still look like a beached whale.  Oh, and quit staring.  I realize that I'm 9 months pregnant, it's over 100 degrees, and yes, I'm miserable.  But, I'm not a circus act so please divert your attention elsewhere.  Luckily, I haven't had many strangers who want to rub my belly.  I attribute this to the fact that I don't smile much and am generally unapproachable.
• I will never again say any of the following to a pregnant woman: "You haven't had that baby yet?", "Aren't you so ready to be done?", "You are definitely going to have that baby early."  If you say these things, you are just rubbing it in.  She is probably incredibly uncomfortable, terrified, and so excited to meet her baby.  
• I promise I'm not crazy or trying to be a hero by wanting an unmedicated childbirth and choosing to cloth diaper.  I've done lots of research.  Please do not try to convince me otherwise and definitely don't tell me about how I'm going to change my mind when the time comes.  
• One of the greatest things about being pregnant is that it is the one time in your life that you don't have to feel like you should be on a diet.  I don't have to feel guilty about every little thing I eat.  In fact, people expect me to eat a lot and crave ice cream.  It's amazing what a relief that is.  Us ladies are trained to be constantly worried about our bodies, and it feels great to not have that kind of pressure.
• Pregnancy brain aka Baby Brain is real.  Now, I'm not convinced that it actually affects brain cells, but being pregnant is enough to distract you from everything else that is happening around you.  It is so hard to concentrate on anything else.
• It's impossible to not worry about your baby all of the time.  For me, the fact that I can't see her to know that she is ok and nothing is wrong is terrifying.  You just have to have faith that all is well, and that is really hard!  
• I never knew it could be so hard to sleep.  It's painful to rollover.  When I wake up (5 times per night to go pee), I feel like I've been in a boxing match - everything hurts!  And don't lay in the middle of the bed unless there is someone to pull you out. You will get stuck there.
• I get asked all of the time if I have any weird cravings.  Overall, I'd say no.  Most of the things I want to eat are things I liked and ate often before.  But, there are a few things that I couldn't have lived without over the last 9 months (some of them only lasted a few weeks): Popsicles, mac & cheese, all things lemon flavored, nachos, ice cream, Sprite, pizza, and peaches
• Stretch Marks = :(
• There is no shame in wearing your husband's tennis shoes every once in awhile (assuming his feet aren't significantly larger than yours, I guess).  None of my shoes fit - even the flip flops are starting to cut into my feet.
• It does seem like it lasts forever.  I can't remember what it was like to not be pregnant. I have a feeling it will be really weird when it's over.
• It's probably for the better, but there are A LOT of things that happen to your body during pregnancy (and after for that matter) that no one ever tells you about.  I'm assuming it's because they aren't the kinds of things that come up in normal conversation and because no one would want to have children if they knew about them!  Then you start reading "What to Expect" and your mind is blown.

Pregnancy is no cake walk (Yum, did someone say cake?), but I hear it's really worth it.  I'm so excited to find out!